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Fact Checking
A call to arms… Create an option of digital delivery for DBT! How I would love to jump on that bandwagon, make some changes, set things straight, make the world a better place. I would’ve too, had I been younger. But now, I’ve lived through a few of these efforts with...
read moreMotivation
Another person calling looking for treatment. Again, they have called so many places, still unable to find care. So many counselors are full, often not having time in their schedules or the bandwidth in their energy to return calls for people seeking help. Ten or...
read moreTry Harder?
I was telling a friend how fulfilled I felt since moving to Arizona. Curious, as she’s also a counselor, my friend asked how that was happening? Considering the question, I said, “as cliché as it might be, I think it is living in the moment. I think I am not thinking...
read moreControl
My grandmother lived in San Diego when I was small. We would go visit; the ocean was a marvel when you’ve grown up in the rolling hills of the Midwest. Before I could ride a bike, I could swim in the ocean. The waves soaring over my head, powerful, crashing down and...
read moreEnergy
Finally rested, I no longer get easily physically or emotionally exhausted. I have stamina again. With this stamina, I have the urge to handle problems that previously might have gone by the wayside as I worked to manage the day to day necessaries. Now, I can see...
read moreBeing Mind
I get in the car with intention. I’m acting OK, but inside I’m like a freight train flying down the track. I can’t stop, there is an urgency to complete, get done, accomplish. This is definitely not the internal space conducive to my current circumstances which...
read moreRest
First hole, playing golf and wanting to speed the pace of play, I turn and run up a steep hill toward the cart. There is a tension, a pop, a loosening and pain in the bottom of my right foot. The rest of the round, I push through. The foot protests more and more with...
read moreDisgust *Warning: This Post Contains a Photo of a Large Spider (Arachnid)
Saturday evening and I was sleepy, headed to bed. I had changed the bed sheets today, which I love. One of the true joys in life is fresh, clean-smelling sheets. My husband was already wrapped up under the covers, on his phone, likely engaged in another high stakes...
read moreI Can’t Stand It
Agitated, irritated, annoyed, itchy in my skin, frustrated, angsty, it feels like I want to simultaneously scream and wriggle out of my skin. Every time, without fail, this is the feeling I have before I make significant changes. I have even started to call it Change...
read moreInternal Experience
When I left my last job in Montana and moved to Arizona, one of my primary hopes was to orchestrate an environment and a routine that would cultivate a shift in my internal experience. Calm, centered, attentive, deliberate and thoughtful could potentially replace a...
read moreTrust
Two whole weeks of not writing; there was nothing to write. An almost imperceptible whale lumbered about in the dark of my subconscious. It’s weight and girth felt, but it’s contours and details eluding me, hidden just below the surface. More than half a year ago in...
read moreChange
Doing yoga at home. Up dog, push up, down dog, round and round through the sun salutation I go. For twenty-four years I’ve done yoga, preferably weekly. It does wonders for the stiff and creaky everythings of being human. Yoga alone is better than no yoga at all, but...
read moreGratitude
Yesterday in the news, President Trump warns us that we could be in for a painful two weeks with death tolls between 100,000 to 240,000 people in the United States. Today, a record 10,000,000 people are unemployed. We are the sick, the dead, the dying and the...
read moreBored
Bored. Bored. Bored. Bored. Bored. Maybe I should watch TV? Saturday Night Live, I haven’t seen that in 20 years. I bet it’s hilarious with all of this quarantine craziness. Well, that was sort of funny. Maybe a Netflix movie or series would be good? I flip show to...
read moreOrienteering
It’s early on a weekend morning. I’m drinking coffee as I talk to a friend on the phone. The normal exchange…she has toilet paper, but can’t find dog food; I have dog food, but can’t find toilet paper. Fifteen or more years specializing in Dialectical Behavioral...
read moreLogic
“What do you mean, alone?” I can tell he is trying to be hesitant, kind, not wanting to hurt my feelings. I appreciate this consideration enormously. Contemplating my coffee, I sit at the kitchen table with my husband of so many meaningful years and our whip sharp...
read moreFear
In the car with my large, gangly and gregarious 14 year old son, I glance nervously over my right shoulder. Purple storm clouds have gathered, a wall across the sky. Remembering myself and the task at hand, I bring my attention back to the road. It is dirt, with deep...
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